For colored girls...

I'm not ashamed 2 say I'm emotional
I cry when I'm sad
And when I'm happy

I watched For Colored Girls over the holidays and cried like a baby, this wasn't my first time watchin this movie.
I cried for the girl that trusted this cool guy she went on a few dates with and thot he was safe enough to invite home.
I cried for the girl that was so hurt by people she loved she hurt herself more everyday
I cried for that woman that kept on taking that no good man back cos she thot that was all she could get...low self esteem is a BITCH!!
Poor woman that lost her kids cos she thot love was enough to heal her man...sometimes you have to move on for you and let him heal himself!
And the character Janet Jackson played, had it all but was played by a man on the down low.
I cried cos I saw myself in a few of these women, cos I could easily have been others,
I cried cos I'm a hopeless romantic and I believe in the power of love.
I cried cos I realise that if its one-sided..its pain.
I cried cos I still want to believe but everyday something erodes my belief.

I'm emotional and I'm not ashamed to say it.
I cried all thru the holidays

Something like Beautiful

Something kinda beautiful..

Happy,smiling,sad,damaged,broken,lively, sweet,caring,carer,sister,lover,friend,chef,smart,beautiful,daughter,playful,weirdo,foodie, prayerful,life of the party,everybody,nobody,good,bad,freak,quiet,geek,listener,chatty, mad, animated,loner,shy,strange,loyal, daddys girl...Me :)

Random.Me

All I ask

To play in the rain..no worries
To sit in the dark without being scared
To sleep without nightmares
To stay home and not worry
To dance in a cool kitchen while cooking
To care for people I care about
To see smiles of appreciation
To receive hugs that express affection
To random hugs when I'm feeling down
To unexpected kisses
To lie awake watching him sleep
To sit in my undies on the floor and
Watch tv while eating eba with my fingers
To playfight just because
To pray for those I love
And worship with those I love
To talk with my dad
And gist with my mum
To sing out loud and dance when I'm alone
To hug my grandmum again - RIP
To stay awake with a good book
To talk all night with a good friend
To love and know its reciprocated

I will give anything...to have this everyday forever

Self destruct

Friendly and friendless
Laughing and sad
counsellor and confused
protector and unprotected
Life of the party

hair all brazilianed up
make up on point
Smile amazing, constantly laughing
Mind's a mess, heart's bleeding

Words swirling round my head- dangerous
Driving on the bridge 160km an hour
swerving in and out of traffic, music blasting
tears flowing, make up running
Wishing for something to take this pain away
hoping to hit something so it stops
Not today

Reached my destination, every one's waiting
adjust, every one's watching
Hair and make up fixed
Smile's amazing

Will try again on the drive home

A Thin line

Nothing ever stays perfect.
No matter how much you try.
What do you do when u can see everything crashing all around you.
My nightmares have become reality,
My sweat filled nights have come back to haunt me
I now see they were trying to tell me something

What to do?
Pray,pray,pray
Kick,fight, cry, scream?
Remember all the good times and pray its enough to overcome the bad?
And if not...accept that's life and
Love definitely hurts?

I wont run away this time though
We are worth much more than this, I tell myself
We can do anything as long as we're together
We had so many dreams, so many things 2 look 4ward to
Why couldn't everything just remain the way they were
Too many what ifs and why nots.
How do you forget what hurts so much?

forbidden!

What is it with guys and wanting what they cant have....

Sweetie I was single for so long u didn't even throw me a bone, now I'm in a relationship all I ever hear is "baby its you I want, you are so attractive, you are sexy"..N**** please do I look stupid. Trying to mess up my happy home. Even Mr No-Good from my previous posts aint trying to be left out...Dude i was chasing ur silly self for years just praying for you to show me a little love and I got nothing. Now you see me happy, you realise you love me. Wow. If I had known this was the solution I would have found a man years ago.. seems I have been dulling.

What is it with guys and wanting they cant have tho? I remember being in uni and spending many a vals day alone or having a pity party with my girlfriends cos well we were single and jand is the worst place for a babe to be naija and single...way too much competition!

Fast forward a few years and here am I beating them off with sticks...only problem is I don't want/need them. It seems like there's been an ad for every single guy that I've ever crushed on, kinda liked, thot was hot/not(for a few) all wanting something or the other. Why now tho...where were they when I almost turned Ann Summers into a grocery shop?

What makes forbidden fruit so desirable? Why am i hotter when i have a man?Why dont I have guys falling over themselves to love me when I'm available to love them back? I spoke to my friends and its the same story even worse for the engaged and married ones while my single friends are bitching that there are no men. Eyin guys kilode o? Can someone tell me wats up?