HYPOCRISY!!!

how many times can 1 person break ur heart before its enough?? Do people get a quota? How many is reasonable...1,2,5,10?? Its so funny that we always have all the answers when the story is about someone else....how can she be so stupid...ehn...God forbid, i cant take that from any guy and all that...yeah i know what we say cos i think im the most vocal when it comes to things like that...just realised im a BIG hypocrite...as in they should flog me in the streets type.

Back to this same "hot sturves" that i blogged about some months ago....he's been in and out of my life since then and as much as im ashamed 2 admit it...im almost falling into the whole cycle again....thank God for the distance cos i cant promise these knickers would have stayed on o!!! Anyway so he said we should give this relationship thing a try, he loves me,( he calls just to tell me he loves me) and i dont even know how to describe how i felt when i heard that cos honestly i'd kinda given up on the whole thing by now and finally gotten over him. He hurt me so so many times that i dont think i can count, and when i think about some of the mean things he did ,i realise that he really couldnt have cared about me and he probably still doesnt. He keeps on telling me to come over, he'd buy my ticket and all that but honestly im scared shitless... i cant deal with another heartbreak but its hard 2 breakaway when u have so much history with one person (2001-2008 is a loooooooooooooong time). I know the sane thing to do but im such a romantic which is actually pure madness to a normal person.

Ok, now you're probably saying, if i know all this then i obviously know what to do right?? Wrong...so wrong!! Im so gone when he comes to him, id rehearse what id say when he calls, but as soon as i hear his voice, i become temporarily dumb! I delete his number which is kind of a moot point since i know it off heart....i blame sex and the city...with Carrie and her Mr BIG!!! Things like that so do not happen in real life...so why cant i just practice what i preach...cos trust me, with my friends im kinda like the relationship counsellor( if only they knew).


Anyway all that is over now( I PROMISE!!), i so deserve a whole lot better than that and im determined not 2 settle for any less...Love is not supposed to hurt or be that difficult!!



On another note entirely....imagine how frustrating it is to be in this naija rainy season without a man....situation is getting very critical o...i coulda sworn i saw cobwebs some days ago...
.....Help needed!! Apply within...with complete CV and full references....experience very important!!